Friday, October 25, 2013

Sad

Yeah, I'm happy.  And yes, I am depressed at the same time.  If that is even possible.  I've got a lot of great things in my life.  But, I'm so lonely.  I feel like I don't really have many people left in my life that I can truly count on.  I have 3 people in my life (besides my family) that really know me, and whom I truly trust.

Yesterday one of those people moved away.  I dunno.  It just sucks.  Makes me feel like my life is still standing in place while everyone else runs forward.  I guess what bums me out is that I didn't even get to see her before she left, due to me being sick and the I guess there being no time after that.  I guess I just feel so disposable to everyone.  I dunno, maybe I am.

Blah.  I need to get these stupid thoughts out of my head.  And I know I'm just rambling now, but I needed to have some sort of outlet.  I keep holding all this stuff inside, and it really is eating away at me.  I'm back to losing weight (the unhealthy way).

I just need friends.  I really wish my grandma was still around.

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